She’s absolutely adorable, just cute as can be.
Also? She can be headstrong and sassy. When she doesn’t want to do something or has her own ideas about how something should be carried out, she’s not afraid to let the whole world know.
If your big day includes a flower girl and you’re desperately seeking a magic wand guaranteed to make her conduct herself like a little angel, you’ve come to the wrong place.
However, we’ve got the next best thing: 11 secrets to well-behaved flower girls.
1. The Details of Her Role are Clearly Communicated
Flower girls are typically 3-8 years old. Depending on the age of your flower girl, it’s important that the details and expectations are explained to her in an age-appropriate manner.
If she’s a visual learner, you can show her Youtube videos of other (well behaved) flower girls. Perhaps seeing girls around her age carry out the duties successfully will help get her motivated and excited about being one. And overall, feel special about her inclusion in the wedding.
2. She’s Involved in Some of the Pre-Wedding Activities
Children love to feel important, and involving her in other aspects of the wedding is an excellent way to help keep the wedding and her impending duties first and foremost in her mind.
Additionally, it provides an opportunity for her to meet and become familiar with some of the other wedding VIPs.
On the big day, it may be fun to allow her some time to get ready with the other bridesmaids.
3. She Practices Her Flower Girl Duties Over and Over
One of the proven ways that leads to flower girl success is practice—and plenty of it.
Practice in different environments. Practice with the flowers and a basket, and practice going through the motions when you don’t have petals on hand.
If she’s shy, try to find ways for her to show people: have her mime her flower girl duties for the woman in the grocery store that stopped to marvel how adorable she is.
The more practice the little flower girl gets, the better and more confident she’ll feel.
4. She’s Met with Positive Reinforcement
Along with practice comes positive reinforcement when she does a great job.
There should be no negative connotations associated with her role as a flower girl, just joy, excitement, and maybe a little treat every time she does well.
5. She’s Dressed in Comfortable Attire
The flower girl dress needs to be comfortable, as should her shoes. Patent leather Mary Jane flats or sandals are great options.
She should be able to move uninhibited, and not be distracted by a garment pinching her, itching her skin, or making her otherwise uncomfortable.
6. She Has a Designated Wedding Day Guide
Perhaps a parent, grandparent, or someone else she’s comfortable with who’s not part of the wedding party.
Having someone there to coax and encourage her may help quell any nerves or feelings of overwhelm when she sees those smiling strangers staring directly at her…
7. She Gets Plenty of Rest Before the Big Day
This is true for everyone: Get as much rest as possible before the big day. If the wedding is in the late afternoon, make sure she abides by her regular nap schedule.
8. There’s an Emergency Kit
The flower girl emergency kit should come complete with snacks and treats. Toss in a coloring book and a new set of crayons to help her bide the waiting time, and a little wrapped gift to give her after for a job well done.
9. She Has a Special Seat
Reserve a front-row seat for her next to her parents so she can settle in after making her way down the aisle.
10. Expectations of Her Abilities are Realistic
Kids can be unpredictable, and different ages come with their own challenges.
Be realistic about your expectations for her, and understand that wedding guests are going to find pretty much whatever she does adorable.
Give her room to be herself along with meeting the expectations of the role. It doesn’t have to be perfect or rigid by any means.
11. There’s a Backup plan just in case
If stage fright gets to be too much, or she flat-out refuses on the day of and has a meltdown of epic proportions, have a backup plan just in case. Perhaps have a Jr. Bridesmaid waiting in the wings, ready to fill in if necessary.
Conclusion:
There you have it. Ample practice paired with preparation is the secret to flower girl success. If you frame it as something exciting and fun, a chance to participate in a “grown up” event, she should feel excited and motivated. Leaving petals and smiles in her wake.
